David “Dave” Heflin
It is with great sadness that the family of David “Dave” Heflin announces his passing on Friday, April 19, 2019, at the age of 63 years.
David was the third and last born Heflin to make his way into this world on June 22,1955 in Norfolk, Virginia to Bill and Carolyn Heflin. After his birth, his mother and father decided a fourth child was completely and totally out of question. The world couldn’t handle another Heflin with those genes.
Or maybe his parents couldn’t.
He came into this world with a vengeance and spent his childhood tormenting and blaming his older brother and sister for everything and getting away with it. Much like the typical “baby” of the family, he got away with more than he ever should have. Testing the boundaries, pushing the limits and breaking the rules was embedded in him from an early age. David would often reminisce about childhood stories like how his brother “bounced like crazy” when his sister pushed him out of a moving vehicle as a child. And the way he can’t stomach the smell of brussel sprouts because his mother put them in a blender and served them to him as a smoothie when he routinely didn’t finish his dinner. Oddly enough, each time he told these stories they seemed to be exaggerated. Inflation of stories was a true art form that David had perfected over the course of 63 years. He never told the same story the same way, twice. And don’t dare try to tell him otherwise.
David worked for Microsoft for most of his career until he retired. He formed many of his deepest friendships and bonds throughout his career at Microsoft. His colleagues during his time there were like a crude, twisted group of fraternity brothers who lovingly had his back through thick and thin and were there for him through all of life’s trials and triumphs. Exchanging memes that would make you question their moral compass via text on the regular - but not using an iPhone. None of them would be caught dead using one of those ratchet Apple devices. Most of them probably using an AARP phone because they’re all old as dirt.
David leaves behind an abundance of stuff that he’s collected for 63 years. Much of it sitting in his front yard displayed like fine art for all of his neighbors to adore. And his HOA. His affinity for all things tacky was really taken to the next level when he slapped the “frah-gee-lay” leg lamp from “A Christmas Story” right in the front window of his home. Lit up year round for all to see.
David was a larger than life personality and if you ever met him, you certainly didn’t forget him. His unrefined sense of humor, colorful language, or ability to always incorporate a “pull my finger” joke in the midst of any situation was really a nod to his ingenuity. He was a real Renaissance man of sorts. Ever heard someone tell a fart joke while eating candlelight Christmas dinner? True craftsmanship.
His ability to bring laughter and joy, even at the most inappropriate of times, is what leaves his family mourning the loss of his short but beautiful life.
On the outside, he had a tough and rugged 6’5” stature but on the inside he was as soft as a marshmallow - though he’d never want you to know it. This can be easily seen as he carried around a 5 pound cotton ball for a dog or the way he lit up when his grandkids told an inappropriate joke to their parents that they learned from Paw Paw. He will be lovingly remembered by his wife of 9 years, Brenda Heflin. He adored her right to the day he passed as he had plans to go out and get her supermarket flowers because “it had been the longest he’d ever gone without getting her flowers”. In addition to a loving wife, he leaves behind children who made him tremendously proud - Chance (Chad) Albertson, Brooke Broome, Matthew (Jessie) Relation, Cade (Ashley) Relation, and Cassie Adams. David will undoubtedly be missed most sorely by his 8 grandkids that lit up his whole world - Madison, Olivia, Haven, Pierceson, Carson, Kaileigh, Brodie, and Zoey. He saw it as his life’s mission to completely wreak havoc on any parenting methodologies that were taught to them and let them have cupcakes for breakfast everyday. Just like any well-adjusted, loving grandparent would. And for that and many other reasons, all 8 of his grandkids love and adore their Paw Paw more than words can express. He also leaves behind his siblings, Anne (Ted) Fletcher, Bill (Peggy) Heflin and sister-in-law Sharon Monterroso as well as his mother-in-law Phyllis Lane.
A Celebration of Life in memory of David will be held on Tuesday, April 23, 2019 at 2:00 p.m., at M.L. Ford & Sons Funeral Home, 4820 Charlotte Highway, Lake Wylie, SC. Receiving of family and friends to follow at 54 Marina Road, Lake Wylie, SC.